As a child, home was with my parents. Originally Liverpool, but mostly Port Elizabeth South Africa. Home is the structure/building that you live in.... or is it?
In the early 1980's, my Dad built a fantastic house for his family to live in. Every aspect of this was home - the physical process of going to the plot every weekend to move bricks or sift sand, making friends in the new neighbourhood in between the work that was needed to complete the house, even understanding that this undertaking was designed to be sold one day to pay for our tertiary education. Our home. Blood, sweat and tears, in good times and in bad. That was the most difficult home I ever had to leave. A few more of the subsequent buildings were just the houses in which I lived, but the next home was the building in which I met my husband and raised my child. That was where I lived for the longest and made the most memories. But it was not always my home; sometimes it was just the house in which I lived.
After deciding that I needed a project house, I started work on a 'fixer upper' that had the most potential to be a happy, long term home. Style, elegance, space, nature, seclusion, freedom, zen; all of the boxes were ticked. But what good is all of that when you are living to work, responsible for an unreasonable level of stress, and eventually coming back at the end of the day to that potential, but without someone to love it with you.
2016 saw my place of residence being on board a cruise ship. Going from a four bedroomed house and my bedroom/dressing room/ en suite sleep retreat with valley views, to a 8' by 12' cabin (shared) with cubical loo/shower, takes more mental strength than you might appreciate. Being used to a dressing room and now facing a single closet and four drawers seems insurmountable. But what one doesn't take into account initially is the amount of reduced stress this simplicity brings. It is breathtakingly refreshing. Every self help guru advocates simplifying your life, and believe me I know how daunting that can be to face. But the results are indescribable. Relief, peace, accomplishment. Who would have guessed? My seven month house detox was a success. I do not wish to return to the bigger better way of thinking when it comes to houses ever again. But as far as home is concerned, I have learnt that one can live in any sheltered structure. To be home means something totally different to each person. It does not mean the house in which you live, but wherever it may be....... Home is where you are loved and needed.
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